Look at any successful enterprise and you’ll find a clear set of values that underpin everything that goes on within its operations.
Same goes for people.
When you know what you stand for—and what you’ll take a stand for—it’s easier to discern where to direct your energy. Our days are full of choice points, moments where we make split-second decisions about how to conduct ourselves:
Will I listen more, or will I ask a question?
Do I move closer?
Will I give voice to my frustration, or check in with my breath and notice where the sensation of frustration sits in my body?
Shall I lean on the horn and make a WTF?? gesture at this person who almost sideswiped me changing lanes, or will I breathe into that space behind my belly button and send up a silent thank-you that they didn’t hit me?
Clear values guide how you will conduct yourself in each moment as it arises. If fun is one of your values, you’ll be looking for ways to inject play or celebration into your day-to-day. If precision is one of your values, it’s likely that you hang up your clothes and keep your tax information in orderly files.
Values are foundational to the way you run your life. Think of values like the roots of a tree. Everything that grows above ground is informed by them.
I’ve worked with a lot of organizations, and I’ve noticed that those groups who have hammered out a clearly understood set of values (and hew close to them in their decision-making) operate with clarity and purpose. Their people know how to behave in any situation because they have a clear understanding of what the organization stands for. Taken in concert with a clear and resonant vision, people really know what to say yes to and how to organize their energy.
Without a clearly agreed-upon set of values, people require more directive leadership. They’ll often look to their leaders for answers or suggestions for how to proceed. These leaders run the risk of becoming decision-making bottlenecks: because people aren’t sure how to behave when the script changes, they wait for instruction.
In your personal life, a lack of clarity around your values can lead to integrity gaps—times when you don’t behave in a way that is consistent with the best self you know you can show up as.
I like Brené Brown’s approach to values. In her Dare to Lead™ training program, she asks three key questions to help people ascertain those values they’re willing to organize their conduct around:
Does this define me?
Is this who I am at my best?
Is this a filter that I use to make hard decisions
Print off a list of potential values (there’s a good one here) and clear some space in your calendar. Circle the ones that immediately pop out as being aligned with your intentions. You might have a lot, and that’s fine.
Now go ahead and stress-test each potential value against the above criteria. Which ones inspire you to live into them at every turn? Which ones give you a felt sense of yes?
Narrow your list.
Then go through the process once more, pitting each potential value against the others to see which ones earn a full-body yes.
Those are your core values.
Brené winnows it down to two. Whether you end up with one (like Zoom) or seven (like Lululemon), your values give you direction and clarity.
I want the same kind of clarity for my business. It has taken me years to arrive at this place where my work is an aligned expression of my divine purpose—my why. So I’ve been putting thought into the values I consider foundational to the work.
Once my mind got quiet, they just…dropped.
You’ve had that experience of things just clicking into place, right? It often happens after you’ve put a lot of thought and energy into an item—and almost always in a moment where you’ve let go of the item, freeing your unconscious mind to work its magic.
That’s what happened for me. The values that guide my coaching practice evolved as I hiked my way around my favourite forest trail recently. It seemed they emerged from the mist, fully formed and perfect for what the business stands for as an expression of my energy in the world:
Presence
Possibility
Faith
Power
Light
And they stack in that order, too, each supporting and setting the foundation for the next.
Presence because that’s where everything is happening. You cannot act in the past. It’s gone, and you cannot change it one bit. Similarly, you cannot act in the future. There is only now.
And also presence, because it’s real. Sometimes it’s a little messy…but it’s real.
Possibility because when you’re in presence, you can access unlimited power. In fact, now is the only place where your power actually works. Depending on what you choose to believe, anything is possible.
Faith because the more willing you are to surrender to life as it arises, and trust that you’re always supported to meet each moment with exactly what you need, the better life will work.
Power because when you stay in presence and have faith that you’re being given what you most need to flourish, your power is strong. Much stronger than when you try to control events, because you’re working with the natural flow of things.
And light because when I honour the other values, I am in touch with my light. And our light is the most powerful energy of all, holding the potential to change everything in our lives, and everything in the world around us.
I’ll break these out in more detail in a series of future posts.
Looking at this list makes me nervous, and I guess that’s a good thing. Holding myself accountable for these values is a definite stretch assignment.
How often do I slip out of presence? (Um, most of the day? Except those times when I…remember to bring myself back here?)
Do I live all the time as if everything is possible? (Judging by the argument I had with my teenaged son yesterday about the importance of cover letters, I still default to choosing fear as my master more frequently than possibility.)
Am I remembering to access my power through trusting that I’ve got what I need to meet each moment as it arises? (Mmmm nope not always. I worry about things I can’t control—the myriad what if scenarios that play out in my future-oriented mind. I’m super glad to report, though, that I’ve come a long way in recognizing when I’ve slipped out of my power, usually by putting my attention on the future / what hasn’t happened yet).
I read somewhere that values should be aspirational—they’re things you continually strive toward, and strive to live into.
It's a stretch assignment that I’m ready to stretch toward.
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